ThanksKilling Is a Thanksgiving Horror on Every Level
Curiosity forces the question, “How many times have you seen ‘half-naked’ and ‘Pilgrim’ in the same sentence?” Released on DVD November 8, 2011, ThanksKilling opens with a tight close-up of a human breast, which we soon learn is part of a half-naked Pilgrim. The film, looking every bit like it was made for the reported $3500 budget, leaves no cliché unturned, as it punnily works its way through a story that centers on a psychopathic killer turkey that is brought back to life after several centuries when a dog urinates on his burial site. (No, I do not make this stuff up.)
It seems some unintelligent college students are on their way to some out-of-the-way backwoods trailer when—surprise—the car breaks down. Do you think they have cell phones? They soon realize that the spot where they decide to camp is the site of an ancient curse—the demonic killer turkey curse. After the nerdiest of the annoying college kids shares details of the legend, one of the female members of the party goes off on her own because…no cell phone signal. She manages to call her dad, but she also runs into the evil turkey, which just happens to talk. We look forward to the promise made on the DVD box: all the college kids will be killed.
Is ThanksKilling the worst Thanksgiving horror film ever made, or is it the worst film made in the history of cinema? Well, yeah, pretty much, but it does have some redeeming values. Fr’instance, $3500 is not a lot of money to keep the large cast and crew off the streets for the duration of the film shoot. Director Jordan Downey accepted no excuses from his cast; if one of the actors said, “I can’t act,” he or she got the job anyway. And, most importantly, it may not be the classiest or the funniest or the most frightening film, but the cast seemed to have fun making it—and who can disparage good, not-always-clean fun?
Would I recommend ThanksKilling for your holiday get-together? Not with a straight-face. But it is so terrible, it entertains. Viewers may wonder each time one of the character refers to “this turkey”—“Are they talking about the bird or the film?”—but with a 66-minute running time, and some of the stupidest gags ever committed to film, ThanksKilling is too short to be painful, too silly to be scary, and too insensitive and vulgar to be politically correct. Other words? It’s got cult written all over it.
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