Enquirer Says Brad And Angelina Have Officially Split — As IF - Page 2
"Brad and Angelina will make appearances together from time to time, and he'll meet up with the kids when he can. But make no mistake, this is a major split," disclosed the insider.
As amusing as it would be to see those two smug-sacks filled with misery over their happy home being busted up, the truth is, this whole story reads like a libel loopholed mess. From the "jealous" Angelina to Brad's supposed contact with ex-wife Jennifer Aniston, there's nothing worth believing. But, let's pretend it's true.
First off, since the two have never been married and therefore have nothing legally binding them, why on earth would they have to divide their $200 million dollar fortune? I'd actually be interested in knowing how they enter into these lease agreements they have on the various places they rent all around the world, as well as, where the supposed "charitable donations" they've given from having their own child army photographed has gone.
Two things you need to consider when speculating about Brad and Angelina and their effed up relationship: Angelina is a media control freak and Brad has the intelligence of a starfish. A pink starfish that lives under a rock to be exact. So there's very little chance that Angelina's going to allow a cheesy media outlet like the National Enquirer break the news of her split with her baby-daddy.
But rest assured, some day, these two buttplugs will split and when they do, it will be a free for all orgasmpalooza for the tabloids. And yes, we will be front and center, with buttered popcorn, ready to relish in all it's delightful and well-deserved karmic goodness.
Nice try NE, but this gets a big fat F for fail.
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