Regarding "Jersey Shore," I Just Feel Bad at This Point - Page 3
She’d punch me for saying this, but this is a young woman with some serious self-confidence issues who cannot handle conflict whatsoever. Instead of having intelligent conversations, Jennifer quickly jumps to screaming and eventually physical confrontation. Sure it makes good trashy TV, but it’s also crazy. Case in point: She didn’t have the guts to tell Sammy that Ronnie was locking lips with other women, so she and Snookie decided to write an anonymous letter about it. If that’s not bad enough, even though their source was Angelina, they did not write the letter with her present, yet they wanted to make her the scapegoat should the crapola hit the fan. Of course, when she was outed, a big fight broke out and she ended up with the nickname “The Beast.” How hard is it to talk to another human being, even if it’s a tough subject like “Your on-again, off-again boyfriend kissed two girls at a club.”
She has a different kind of self-confidence issue. Angelina lies about everything in order to gain acceptance, but she’s terrible at it. How bad is it when you can’t even be a semi-talented liar? The future does not bode well for this one. When called out on it she consults her Liars 101 Handbook with lines like “No I didn’t” and “I don’t care” or “I’m single.” Angelina spends all day on the phone and gives me the impression that she cannot survive without her mother. Seriously Angelina’s Ma, what have you enabled here? What goes through your head when you watch the show? I recommend signing her up for classes that focus on functioning in everyday society. I’m not being mean. Angelina needs some major assistance. She’s not 12 anymore.
As a group, their behavior is more in line with tweens, not twenty-somethings. I don’t expect them to be the perfect models of maturing youth, but most are missing out on some seriously basic functionality. They’re on minute 14 of their allotted 15 and I worry that once it’s done, they’re either all moving back in with their parents or sucking on the MTV teet for the next 10 years.
MTV, I’m recommending two options. Either cancel the show or hire me as an Italian Behavioral and Cultural Specialist. Lesson one: Getting through breakfast without a fight.