No McNuggets? No Mercy!
PerpPlexity is a periodical celebration of criminals who have yet to reach the mastermind status — we'll settle for asking them to simply think the next time.
Sometimes there are moments in which my hometown of Toledo, Ohio gets me on my knees and elicits tears of pride. That's my town! They well up my senses with a zen-like emotion that does not come off, not even in the shower.
On an unrelated note, some Toledo woman punched a McDonald's employee because they weren't serving Chicken McNuggets.
Melodi Dushane strolled into the Main Street Mickey D's just after 6 o'clock in the morning with intend to order many of their fine dinner products. One problem: 2:30 a.m. is the cutoff time for dinner. From then on, it's breakfast or the highway, as they say. This caused Ms. Dushane to pull up to the window, argue with the employee (whose fault it was, of course) and lean out of her car to punch her in the mouth. This is a textbook case of chicken withdrawal.
But, Ms. Dushane, don't you realize what you've stumbled upon? It's incredibly hard to find McDonald's during breakfast hours! They're like oases in the horizon. Order up your McMuffin and your hash browns, be glad with what you've reaped, and leave the poor minimum wage woman alone.
She pleaded not guilty to the felony vandalism charge. She then felt hungry.
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