Can I Have Work/Life Balance Working Full Time?
Monday was my official return to full-time employment since my daughter was born 9 years ago. Going back to work full-time has always been in the Plan.
The Plan was that when our youngest was 2 1/2, therefore old enough to start preschool, I would return to work full-time. Logically this makes sense:
I am an advocate of preschool. I really believe that kids benefit from the structure, the social skills, listening to authority figures other than their parents, and actively being taught academics.
- My husband lost his job in May and we need the money.
- A person's 30s and 40s are key years for building a reputation, making connections, and really establishing yourself in your field. I'm in my prime earning potential and career making years.
Great. Everything is going according to plan, and logically the plan makes sense.
So why aren't I jumping up and down with joy about how great everything is working out? After all, my Myers-Briggs says that I am a logical person (INTJ), right?
There isn't anything large and definitive that I can point to and say - aha! That's why. Instead, there are little things:
- My 2 year old calls for Daddy to come help her on the potty. This used to be my job, but he's the one home with her during the day. Weird, to be upset about not having to wipe a poopy butt, don't you think?
- My kids walk to the bus stop at 8:30. I have already been out of the house for over an hour by then. Most days they wake up about 5 minutes before I walk out the door, so I am able to kiss them goodbye and tell them I love them.
- I kiss the soft, innocent cheek of my sleeping 2 year old just before I walk out the door.
- I don't recognize who my husband's talking about when he says "You know. Tracy? The blond lady that usually sits in the minivan at the bus stop?" No, actually, I don't.
I recently told my executive coach that I was planning to start working out regularly once I went full-time. I felt I would have more time then.
That sounds backwards doesn't it? Work more hours and have more time for me? How does that work?
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