Dentists Paying Kids To Donate Halloween Candy
Listen up America! Halloween candy is BAD for you!
The news this week is full of warnings about candy recalls, candy calorie counts, lists arranged by tooth rot factor, and alphabetical numeric analysis of ass expansion potential.
If Americans wanted to know how fast a Reese's was going to land on their thighs they probably wouldn't have invented a sugar binge holiday that required costumes made of cheap stretchy fabric and elastic-waistbands.
In recent years, schools and organizations across the country have sought to encourage candy binge moderation, by providing donation bins to collect "extra" candy the day after Halloween. In theory, this is a great idea. Teaching kids about generosity and sharing is always a good thing but am I the only one irked by the site of children hauling in massive bags of "extra" candy in to school? They should provide wheelbarrows for some of these kids!
Just how many doorbells does it take to fill a pillow case, or 5?
There's even a program for kids looking to profit from their noble candy donation efforts. The Halloween Candy Buy Back program encourages dentists to enroll in the program and then "buy back" kids' candy. With money. Your kids sell their loot. For money. Approximately $1 per pound, according to numerous recent publications.
The Halloween Candy Buy Back program is run by a fantastic volunteer organization, Operation Gratitude. Operation Gratitude sends care packages containing food, hygiene products, entertainment items and personal letters of appreciation to deployed American service men and women. Last year Operation Gratitude received and shipped 21 tons of candy and expects to top that this year. The Halloween Candy Buy Back program website provides other suggestions, including donating oral hygiene products and having patients and suppliers write letters to the troops. Unfortunately, most of the headlines and articles written about participating dentists are focused on the money.
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