Feature: Parenting

Loving Your Kids is Not Enough

Author: Tor Constantino
Published: April 11, 2012 at 2:53 pm

My wife and I are expecting our third child in mid-June. As I just noted, we've already run this baby-raising race before with two daughters ages ten and seven respectively.

Even though it's not our first time on the parental carousel of baby belly laughs, sleep deprivation and dirty diapers, it's certainly been a while.

As 40-somethings, we're having to do a lot of things again that first-time parents are doing such as registering for a baby shower; attending birth classes as well as touring the hospital's birthing center.

Needless to say we're bumping into a lot of couples who have "baby bumps" of their own for the first time.

Interestingly, every expectant couple we've bumped into talks about how they "…love the idea of being parents…" or plan to "…shower their baby with love…" or how they aspire to be “…more loving…” than their own parents.

I love that "love" seems to be front and center for many new parents.

That's great, because parental love for a child is critically important!

But there are other aspects of parenting that must not be forgotten during the early years of raising a healthy, well-adjusted child.

We're not perfect parents by any stretch of the perineum, but we have learned a few things that are as important as love.

Child development experts agree that security and stability are equally important for the healthy nurturing of a child as love. Children must feel and be safe to thrive.

We've all heard sad stories where very loving parents unwittingly leave their child under the supervision of an abusive caregiver or nanny. Security is key.

Beyond providing a safe environment to ensure the child’s health and security, parents must also focus on and invest in each other to ensure a healthy, secure relational foundation for the child as well.

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Article Author: Tor Constantino

Tor Constantino is a former journalist, bestselling author, marathon runner and current PR guy who lives near Washington, DC with his wife and kids. He blogs regularly at http://www.thedailyretort.com

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