Happy Birthday Governor Romney... My Gift To You
Polls show a virtual dead heat as Mississippi and Alabama voters head for the polls today. As Republican front-runner Mitt Romney celebrated a birthday recently (on the 12th of March) I thought I'd offer him the following. Forgive me if I address him directly;
Happy Birthday Governor! I hear you're 65.
Thus, my gift is this advice to help your campaign thrive;
Sir, just be yourself. Please try it out before you knock it.
Can't be worse than quoting lyrics about Davy Crockett.
Seems your Southern Strategy is eating cheesy grits;
Ask an Alabama guy for Skynard's greatest hits,
Saying things like "Hi ya'll" in accents from the North...
Frankly, with a plan like that, you're lucky you're not 4th.
Pandering to voters, 'though a tactic tried and true,
Wrapped up in a flag that's colored red and white and blue
Touring states with comics where they're thinking; "What the heck?"
"That guy is from Massachusetts. He ain't no red neck."
Sir, that cannot help your cause. You're looking like a phony.
Voters want to hear details; not corn pone and baloney...
And, please, in your campaign ads? Don't go the nasty route.
Show the voters who you are and not some empty suit.
In the interests of full disclosure, I am a registered Independent voter from one of Governor Romney's many home states. I am one of those snobs who attained a thoroughly useless degree in Political Science and, these days, I am most decidedly leaning towards President Obama. Nothing I've seen so far has convinced me otherwise.