Steele Knows How Caesar Felt — Except for the Stabbing
Former Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele knows JUST how Julius Caesar felt. Except for the part about getting shanked by his friends and colleagues. I don't think Steele has ever actually been stabbed.
Anyhoo...
Who among us hasn't felt the betrayal of being laid low by the metaphorical blades of those we thought of as colleagues, falling to the metaphorical marble floor of the metaphorical forum as our metaphorical blood spurts from the dozens of metaphorical wounds.
Metaphorically, that is.
Steele took his grievances to the conservative website, "The Frum Forum" to state his case and salve his many, many grievous wounds.
“I know exactly how Caesar felt,” Steele says, without a hint of irony. “It is what it is.” He claims that Priebus had been planning to defect for six, seven, eight months before announcing a bid for the chairmanship. Steele was blindsided. “I trust my friends. Well, I guess the adage is right. In Washington, you should get a dog… We put a lot of resources in Wisconsin over the last two years… that’s what you do for [the] team.”
He doesn’t regret much, he claims. “Just gives you headaches.” But he does wish he had thrown a few more punches when he had the chance.
“I fight. I’m a fighter. The only thing I wish is that I could have slapped some folks upside the head more when I had the title and the job,” says Steele, smiling. “[But] now maybe I get to do that a little bit more.” How? Shrugging, Steele laughs again. “In my own way… All I know is that what goes around does come around. That’s the nature of politics.”
Yes, one can almost imagine what it must have been like in the RNC committee room that fateful day before the Ides of January...
(And here, you need to imagine your computer screen going all wavy as we meld into a flashback scene...)
STEELE
Are we all ready? What is now amiss
That the Chairman of the Republican National Committee must redress?
CINO
Most high, most mighty, and most puissant Chairman!
Maria Cino throws before thy seat
An humble heart,--
STEELE
I must prevent thee, Cino.
These couchings and these lowly courtesies
Might fire the blood of less extraordinary chumps,
And turn pre-ordinance and first decree
Into the law of Cheese Nugs. Be not fond,
To think that Steele bears such rebel blood
That will be thaw'd from the true mission
To separate riches held by bammas; I mean, sweet words,
Low-crooked court'sies and base spaniel-fawning.
And what the hell does "pussiant" mean?
If thou dost seek mine badinkydink to kiss
I spurn thee like a cur out of my way.
Know, Steele doth not wrong, nor without cause
Will he be satisfied. Just sayin'
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