funny jokes

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Latest blogosphere posts tagged “funny jokes”

 

• How many?

  
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  Adam returned home late at night, and entered the front door with staggering feet.  As soon as he saw his wife Stella, he ordered her to come with him upstairs as he wanted a screw immediately. "What the hell Adam," said Stella, "How many have you had tonight?" "Just the one." Adam replied in a slurred voice. ...
  1 week ago

• Dost Sardr G Apki Bivi

  
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  Dost Sardr G apki bivi apky dost k sath park ma baithi ha Sardr park ka chakar laga kr wapis akar dost sy Ja yar ayven chakar lawaya E O mera dost ni koe hor C The post Dost Sardr G Apki Bivi appeared first on SmsTashan .
  1 week ago

• One day at a busy airport

  
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  One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind ; the pilot is using a white ...
  1 week ago

• Amazing dog

  
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  I followed a man with his dog from the movie theater last night and said to him “You have an amazing dog there. I was watching him through the film and he was laughing and crying in all the right places. Isnt that really unusual ". "It is" he replied "considering he absolutely hated the book".
  1 week ago

• Pythagorean theorem

  
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  A Native American chief has three wives living in three wigwams and one day he offers them new bed covers. The first asks for a buffalo-skin hide as a cover, and this is duly delivered. The second wife asks for a bear-skin hide and, although this is more dangerous to catch, one is eventually bought to her. The ...
  1 week ago

• Funny Jokes - Feminine or Masculine?

  
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  A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.  House for instance, is feminine: la casa. Pencil, however, is masculine: el lapiz .  A student asked, What gender is computer?  Instead of giving the answer, ...
  1 week ago

• Short funny jokes-Reunions

  
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  Tina is very fond of attending her class reunions, reason? According to Tina, it is real fun and excitement to see all those old faces and new teeth.
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• Little Johnny jokes-Dead Goldfish

  
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  Little Johnny was filling a hole in the garden when his neighbor looked over the fence and asked "What are you doing here? " "Ive just buried my goldfish , it died" replied Little Johnny tearfully. "That is a mighty large hole you dug for a goldfish" said the neighbor. Patting down the last bit of earth, Little ...
  1 week ago

• Sit!

  
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  You cant just make ANYBODYs dog sit without knowing the right command.
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• Heaven and Hell

  
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  It was a Sunday and the preacher was addressing a mass in the church. During his sermon, the preacher broached the subject of Heaven and Hell, how good deeds allow you a place in Heaven and how bad deeds make you suffer in Hell. Finally done, the preacher commanded: “Raise your hands - those of you who want to go to ...
  1 week ago

• Very funny jokes-First Twitter Date

  
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  Brad: That was a great show. So.. did you want to come up to my place and check out my TweetDeck? Betty: ummm... I dont think so. Brad: Well then how about my Twhirl pool? Betty: Look.. you’re a cute guy, but after seeing your Fail Whale this just isn’t going to work!
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• "Lie and Lust rule human beings."

  
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  In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth -- if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. "I think Im the smartest woman on ...
  1 week ago

• Funny jokes-Wish to Win

  
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  A Scotsman out walking his dog accidentally kicks a small shiny object. Out pops a genie declaring that he is the genie of the lamp, and for freeing him from his 1000 year imprisonment the Scotsman will be granted one wish. The Scotsman asks, "Can you make my dog win Crufts?" "Im sorry", replies the genie, "but your ...
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• Really funny jokes-Dont want to go to Church

  
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  Irina went to wake up her son for church one Sunday morning. When she knocked on his door, he said, "Im not going!" "Why not?" asked Irina. "Ill give you two good reasons," he said. "One, they dont like me. Two, I dont like them." Irina replied, "Ill give you two good reasons why YOU WILL go to church. One, youre ...
  1 week ago

• Really funny jokes-Car dents

  
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  POSH takes her car into a garage to have some dents removed. The garage man, knowing she isnt the brightest Spice Girl in the world, decides to play a joke on her. "You dont need me to take those dents out," he says. "Just blow up the exhaust pipe and the metal will pop back into place." So she takes the car home ...
  1 week ago

• Miracles of Jesus

  
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  [IMG: http://www.helpfeedthetroll.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Jesus_Gives_Vision.png]
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• Funny jokes-Remainder

  
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  A banker was recently arrested having embezzled $ 120,000 for his sons University education. The arresting police officer, who had also a son at University said as he was putting the handcuffs on him. "One question puzzles me "he said "Where was the remainder of the money you need coming from?".
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• Office jokes-Meetings

  
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  Are you Lonely? Dont like working on your own? Hate making decisions? Then call a MEETING!! You can:- SEE people, DRAW flowcharts, FEEL important, IMPRESS your colleagues (and all on company time) MEETINGS.... The practical alternative to work!
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• Hilarious jokes-Health warning

  
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  Aramco Helth Department Large scale outbreak of Texanitus hits Saudi Arabia During the last 30 years there have been occasional outbreaks of Texanitus, but this last one appears to have reached epidemic proportions. Consequently the Health Department consider it necessary to ease the panic that is sweeping the ...
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• A gift for girlfriend

  
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  Fred says to his friend Sam, "I want to buy a gift for my girlfriend on her birthday but I am not sure what she would like. Can you suggest something?" Sam : "Does she like you?" Fred : "Of course yes." Sam : "Then she would like anything."
  1 week ago

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