The Facebook iPad app: 5 amazing features
This article is for entertainment purposes only; facts and opinions included may be partly or entirely fictional.
Finally, the wait is over: More than a year after the Apple iPad was introduced, Facebook has launched its offical iPad app.
Nick O’Neill, the leading Facebook expert running AllFacebook.com, tells you about five amazing features of the new iPad app that will let you use Facebook like never before.
1: Automatic privacy protection
Nick: "A lot of folks are using Facebook without thinking. They post anything and everything, especially when they're totally wasted or spaced out. I can understand that, I still regret posting those details about how much I love to have kinky sex in a bunny suit - but the app will take care of that. It will analyze your profile and if you start posting freaky stuff, it will automatically convert it to something harmless. Like, "Look, I bought a funny bunny costume for my 8 year old niece".
2: Personal tips for better photos
Nick: "If you spend any time on Facebook you will quickly notice how horrible people usually look on photos. They look like they washed up on shore this morning, didn't sleep for days, or wear a wig back to front. And all they needed were some tips to take a better photo. That's where the app comes in. It will tell you how you'll look best. Like, "Never show that 'Geek Power' tattoo", "You'll need a double push-up bra to pull this off", or "Don't take off that mask".
3: Improved dating functions
Nick: "For all those losers that have a few thousand friends, but still don't get a date, the iPad app has a great feature; the Match Maker. It will save you tons of time by automatically seeking suitable people and spamming them with smooth talk until they friend you. That's how I got my last girlfriend. It worked like a charm. Well, I needed a crate of wine to help her understand I am the love of her life when we met in person, but other than that, the app did all the online flirting for me."
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