Stepford Girls & Queen Bees - Page 2
The girls I saw at the cafe wore their insecurity as clearly as the rest of the labels adorning themselves. They lacked confidence, creativity, individuality. I see those same traits in their mothers. The Stepford Moms. It becomes palpable on a grown woman without the veil of immaturity and inexperience to hide behind. What left me staggering were the comments coming from the mouths of those girls.
"I dare you to go over and tell that girl how ugly her outfit is." This coming from a girl wearing fuzzy boots and track shorts.
"She better not think she can come sit here. Those are fake Uggs she's wearing!"
"I bet that girl buys her clothes as Target." Um, guilty as charged here. Nothing wrong with that.
"That man over there looks like a hobo. I bet he smells."
I found myself talking loudly and incessantly, lest my young sons overhear such banter.
I'm not sure at what age we gain our confidence and security. I suspect it never comes along for some women, while for others it waxes and wanes. I don't know when we learn compassion and empathy and humility. I don't know if generous people are born or made. What I do know is that mean girls turn into mean women. It is easy to be judgmental and demeaning when protected by your pack. Belittling others never makes you bigger. I tell myself this every time I feel the hot degrading stares from the Stepford Moms. I don't fit their mold and I'm okay with that.
I was never a Queen Bee or a Wannabe. Sure, I lacked confidence and often pined to be in anyone else's skin but my own. But I wasn't mean. I wasn't a lemming. The one time I was has haunted me for 20 years. When I saw those young girls the other day, after I brushed away my anger and disgust, I was filled with pity. What a pity to feel the need to denigrate others in order to feel important and valued. What a pity to squash your individuality to fit a mold that's unbecoming in the first place. What a pity to live life as a faceless wannabe. What a pity to raise girls who feel no shame and enjoy no confidence.Continued on the next page