Giving Thanks, Getting Chuckles
Half my summer has been spent in doctor's offices. On some of the most gorgeous days, I have handed over wads of cash to the babysitter and made my way to the city's upper East Side. To sit in air conditioned offices clutching copies of my records. For one more visit. One more test. One more consultation.
After a year and a half of trying, my husband and I are up against the wall known as "Secondary Infertility." I have been unable to blog. Unable even to bring many of my friends up-to-date on the situation and all the myriad facts. But other women have been writing here, and on other blogs, and support lists, and in books, about facing the same problem, and I have to say, it has given me strength.
I am right there with these women, struggling with the same issues, with my age ratcheting everything up. The stakes are so high, the pressure so intense, the life changing results so astounding, it can make my head swim.
Sometimes I just stop, and do the dishes.
But I want to say thank you. I want to say thank you to all the brave women chronicling their stories and sharing their insights and ideas. Their fierce hope, and God - their humor. Thank you for writing it all down. Thank you for being so brave.
When I started on this path I was a mixture of denial and smugness. I had expected problems when I tried to get pregnant the first time, but there had been none. So I was unprepared for our current situation. I didn't go see the specialists sooner. I didn't push for certain tests right away. I just started charting my cycle more thoroughly.
And when I finally landed in the fertility clinic? Yeah, even then, I thought "Hey, they'll just give me some drugs and everything will be fine."Continued on the next page