Comfort in the Chaos of Moms
I was at a friend’s birthday party this past weekend
when thank Buddha, I found them. The
only other mommies in the room. Without
effort or intention, we stumbled upon each other amongst the horde. We must have given off a new-mommy-vibe or something.
Throughout the night, I bobbled back and forth
between groups, saying hello to old friends who are still single, boobs still perky
and un-mom-ified, and chatting with newly married couples about big travel
plans. I made the rounds and loved every
second of it. But man-o-man, how nice it
was to come back to my mommy-pod between minglings.
I barely knew one mom yet felt totally comfortable going on and on about how I’d “been crying all day ‘cause I can’t get my baby to latch anymore. And I somehow can’t get over it and she seems totally fine!”
Try saying that to a group of single ladies at a
party, sans baby…Total buzz kill.
But these mommies laughed at me. Because it is ridiculous, and because they
can completely empathize. “We young moms
are a dying breed.” One of the women
said candidly while sipping the one drink she’d be having that night.
“We sure are.”
We all nodded as we watched a random man jokingly hump the leg of a
still-single-girl, both of them loving it.
Among my close girlfriends, I am the first to have a
baby. So every step of the way, my girls
questioned and watched my process. Of
course, I would have done the same thing.
As a woman of baby-making age, watching someone else go through
pregnancy gives us the opportunity to reflect on what “it might be like for me.” And
I get that. I do.
But geez, is it nice to be among other mommies to
whom I don’t have to explain why I am leaking, or sweating, or missing my
family though it’s only been an hour.
Within seconds there’s a sisterhood, no matter how long we’ve known each
other or how long ago we’ve had our “babies.”
The truth is, whether it’s at a friend’s party, or
at the library with a group of screaming toddlers, I feel comfort in the chaos
of other moms now. I love my single
girlfriends and need them in my life. But
there are times when it’s difficult that none of them can share in the same
highs and lows that I do with a child.
Thankfully, no matter where I go, there are mommies to bump into. I know I can always count on that. And maybe when it’s time for my girlfriends to start having kids of their own, my family circus will provide reassurance for them when they need it the most. I suppose I can take comfort in that too.