Bloomin’ Flower Girl Dress - Page 2
While the sales lady procured the dress, I joined in and “ohh’d” and “ahh’d” over the blue Converse. “Mommy, can I have them,” she asked. I think she even fluttered an eye lash or two. “Well,” I said. “If you can try on the flower girl dress, then, I’d be happy to buy you a new pair of shoes.” This was the ultimate act of desperation/manipulation and anyone who knows me will attest this is not my typical mommy maneuver.
Eyes wide-open, she agreed and I grabbed her hand and sprinted to the changing room before she could change her mind. She had conditions though. She would only try on the dress over her clothes – including sweat pants. Nope – the dress didn’t fit right or look right (even considering the extra clothes). She quickly took it off and raced back to the shoe rack.
We left Nordstrom’s – my daughter wearing a smile and her new $40 pair of neon blue Converse. I left exhausted. Today, I did two things. First, I order a flower girl dress online (approved by the bride) and sight unseen by the unsuspecting flower girl. I also made a behavioral contract for my daughter. There are seven items listed on the contract and five of the items relate specifically to dress/appearance.
I’ve been pretty lax about appearance – trying every conceivable strategy to let her assert her independence/control. Quite frankly, I’m sick of the ongoing battles and I’m especially tired of her looking like a matty-haired, rag muffin wearing stained old clothes. For this wedding, I refuse to concede on appearance.
However, since I want to actually enjoy the wedding, we’re going to start dressing nicer for events – church, first day of school, special dinner in, special dinners out. We’re going to practice so the wedding day isn’t wracked with anxiety for the both of us. And, we’re going to have freebie dress days too where she chooses whatever she wants in whatever combination and I will simply smile and say “what a fun style you have.” For a reward, maybe, I’ll even let her chose my outfit for a day ... maybe.